spinnersending | Just Causes

Just Causes

"Just Causes"
Who: Severus Snape & Remus Lupin
When: 6th Year
Chapter One: Here
Chapter Two: Here

Tomorrow night, this place would be filled with a beast tearing at itself until his friends could arrive to keep it calm and keep it company. Tonight, there was a beast of a different sort in the room, one unnamed but just as fearful. Swallowing, it was all that Severus could do to clean up as bit before Remus's mouth was on him again.

He laughed. Laughed. Mostly this was directed at himself for being so pathetically stupid. All this time he could have been with Remus and instead, they had left each other feeling miserable over misunderstandings.

Severus was quiet. Where they were going to do, he wasn't quite sure but he wanted to find out!

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Well they had that in common, didn't they? Severus's only stable -- and that was up for debate -- connection with the outside world was steeped in the 'things' that Remus mentioned happening outside of those walls.

Severus was seduced by the owls he received about them...though since he'd met Remus, he had been thinking more of the things he could accomplish with the other boy.

Animagi spells, a patronus! Remus was his muse and lucky charm.

"The world is dangerous already. Fact of the times. You're in the classes you need to be an auror. Dumbledore will get you in."

He'd heard about the Wizards going missing, the speculations going about Knockturn Alley. They all said something was coming, and it was big. Remus didn't like it either. The Marauders had recently started talking about it. Sirius feared the worst about his family.

"Dumbledore can't change the laws. It's that blasted Umbridge woman. She's set any halfbreed relations back centuries. And not just with werewolves, centaurs, too. They already don't trust us." Remus shook his head. "I trust Dumbledore. I know he'll help, but even he isn't a miracle worker. Of anyone out there, I know that best."

Severus couldn't stand the pain in Remus's voice. This conversation was over. Even though they rarely spoke about themselves, their relationship was based less off of who they were outside the collection of touches they gave each other and more on who they were here and now.

In the very impossible present. Severus gently kissed the underside of Remus's chin and changed the subject rather abruptly, discussing different facets of one of the spells they were learning in charms and how he was trying to reimagine it for more practical use as a hex.

It was a lighter conversation and Remus was grateful for the change in topic. Especially about the one on hand. They continued to talk until Remus noticed the time. He moved slowly, but he knew he had to get back.

"I don't think I'll be able to get away from the Marauders this weekend. They'll be all over me about the full moon. But Monday? Maybe we can work on homework during lunch and after dinner we can work on your Animagus. It's been awhile." Remus said as he put his robe back on.

Lunch was almost over and Remus knew Severus had other classes and the James and Sirius had a period off. He needed to make it back the boys' dorm room before they did.

Severus kept as much of his emotions in check as he could. It was hard to shield his eyes. The hiding did not bother him as much as the loneliness did. It was for his own good, he knew this, if Black or Potter got wind of what they were doing, Remus would be put in a bad position. Handjobs did not replace years of friendship.

If there had to be a choice, Severus knew he would not be it. "All right."

What else could he say? He knew better than to protest. It was unfair. It was unbelievably unfair. But so was everything else in his life.

"Monday is fine."

Truth was, he'd already chosen Severus. He knew the moment that he kissed the other boy the first time, back at the floor of the Shrieking Shack that he chose him. Remus just couldn't leave his old life behind. All he wanted was to be wanted and accepted and he feared his friends wouldn't if they knew. Sirius especially.

And it pained him the way Severus looked up at him. Remus saw the hurt. Leaning over the bed, Remus pressed himself to the other boy and kissed him. It was both longing and hard, a kiss meant to last the two of them two days. He ran a hand down Severus' body as he did so, memorizing ever inch his skin made contact.

Severus held on to Remus, well aware that his fingers were clutching the side of his robes so tightly tht he actually caused his hands to tingle from lack of blood. It was all right, he decided. This would hold him over.

((Contined here: http://spinnersending.livejournal.com/1636.html ))

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Just Causes

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